For better or for the best
by vaso.caskett
Summary: Based on a Tumblr prompt: Kate's pregnant with their first baby at the end of 6x23. They don't find Castle until Kate goes into labor. He knew nothing about the pregnancy.


**Author's Note:** Thank you so much to Jo for the beta despite her limited time. The story wouldn't have been the same without her comments and input.

Hope you like it.

* * *

It had been weeks of trying to find him, and Kate was hardly eating, sleeping or getting any rest. Her only focus was on bringing him back. From the moment she'd looked in the car and seen no body in the car, she had been driven. Whoever took Castle would pay, but first she had to bring him back.

Alexis and Martha were relying on her; they've become closer in the weeks following his abduction. In fact, she is still staying in the loft for the few hours she'd allow herself to rest. But all that faith they had in her, added to her anxiety levels. What if she failed them, if she failed him? She wouldn't be able to forgive herself if something happened to him.

So for all this time she's put herself second or even third on her priority list. She hasn't taken the nausea or the dizziness into account. She has just shrugged it off, shrugged everyone's concern off and kept working towards finding Castle. But, in the loft with his family, she could deny no longer that something was wrong.

"So yeah… one more dead end. Whoever took him, whoever staged the accident, has managed to leave no trace, nothing to go by." Her eyes water at the admission. She sees Alexis ready to break down, Martha at her side trying to comfort her and she tries to take the few steps from the kitchen island where she is sitting, to the couch where the two redheads sit listening to her. When she gets up though, her vision blurs and she manages at the last moment to sit back down. Both women are next to her in seconds.

"Katherine, are you alright?" she hears Martha asking. She tries to speak but that makes her nauseous and she makes it to the sink just in time to empty her stomach. Once she is done, she sits on the ground, trying to understand what just happened. Now it's Alexis' turn to crouch next to her and make sure she is alright. She is paper white, drenched in sweat and she is not fooling anyone.

"Maybe you should see a doctor, dear," comes Martha's suggestion.

"No, I'm alright; it's probably the stress. Don't worry about me."

"Nonsense, you've run yourself into the ground the last few weeks, it's time we look after you for a change. Now, I know you hate hospitals, that's why we'll call our family doctor to come and check up on you here." Her tone leaves no room for objections and if she is to stay home and have someone come for her, she sees no reason to deny how she feels any longer.

Martha and Alexis make her a soup to settle her stomach till the doctor comes, and by the time he is there she already feels a lot better. He asks her about any other symptoms, any tiredness she might feel but she shrugs everything off with the excuse of the late hours at the precinct. She doesn't fool him, though, and he insists on drawing her blood 'just to be on the safe side'. She lets him if it means that he'll leave sooner rather than later. He suggests rest and proper food and exits with the promise to call with the results.

The call comes the next day. She has no new case, but is at the precinct looking once again through Castle's file.

"Miss Beckett…" The doctor is hesitant, and she knows nothing good can come out of this phone call.

"Tell me, Doctor, I can handle whatever it is." Only she can't. Once she hears the words pregnant, baby and OBGYN she stops listening. She can't do this. She can't do this without Castle.

"Miss Beckett, I know this is a lot to take in, considering the circumstances, but you should make an appointment as soon as possible. And another thing, you'll need to start taking prenatal vitamins."

"Yes, I will, thank you, Doctor."

She doesn't know how to react. Normally she'd be happy but she didn't think she'd have to do this without Castle by her side. She calls Martha; the first person who will understand how she feels right now. Martha is happy for them that's as much as Kate manages to understand before the older woman breaks down and she mumbles something about being happy, and how great it would be to find Castle and tell him the good news.

They book an appointment for the next day and that's when the doctor determines that she is already two months along. She gives her the recommendation for the brand of vitamins she needs, along with an order to rest and take care of herself. "You're not only taking care of yourself now, remember that the next time you skip a meal, or stay too long at work," she points out. Beckett agrees to cut down on her hours in the precinct and Martha is offering to do exactly what her son would do if he were here; take care of her and make her see reason when she gets too deep in his case.

Kate hasn't spoken much since they left the doctor's. They enter the house and she is so glad Alexis isn't home. She doesn't think she can tell anyone else right now. Not when she's barely had time to digest it herself. She tells Martha she needs some rest and heads for the bedroom.

Two months along. Somehow, she recalls the night this miracle might have happened. After they'd caught Bracken, once they'd come back from DC after finishing the debrief and paperwork, Gates gave her the next two days off and they decided to leave for the Hamptons to avoid the reporters and whoever else wanted a statement from the woman who arrested the Senator.

For the next few weeks, everyone keeps telling her that she has to take a step back from the investigation, cut back the hours at the precinct but how can she explain to them that it's even more important to find him now? She doesn't want to do this without him. Before Castle, the idea of children sent her running the other way, it was only when she got together with him that the idea of a family, their family, appealed to her.

She decides to start a scrap book, something to give him when he comes back. It won't by any means replace what he's missed, but she hopes it will be something.

She starts by pinning her blood test and ten words beneath.

"Castle, I'm pregnant. I cannot do this without you."

* * *

 _Seven months later, February 2015._

Kate is almost due, she might go into labor any day now, but a phone call from Ryan has brought her back to the precinct. She has to see for herself if after eight months of nothing, the tip they got from a sheriff is any good or just another dead end.

She steps foot in the precinct for the first time after her sixth month. The doctor, deeming the environment too stressful, suggested she got some rest and lay back on work.

"Whoa Beckett are you pregnant or something?" teases Esposito.

Ryan, who got to witness pregnancy with Jenny, is more understanding and is next to her to help guide her to her desk.

"Thanks, Ry."

They start small talk about her pregnancy and her preparations for when the time comes but she starts to get impatient. She knows Ryan means well, but she wants to hear about the new information. They show her instead; Jerry Tyson, in the flesh, walking out of a convenience store outside of Connecticut. They inform her that the Sheriff is hot on his heels and a SWAT team is now in a farm outside a small town called Stars Hollow.

She can't breathe. Castle was right all these years. Tyson is alive, and the mastermind behind his disappearance. That sends a shiver down her spine. If Tyson had him captured for these last eight months she is scared for his life, his mental wellbeing. If anyone can play mind games with Castle that's Tyson.

"Beckett, hey, relax, breathe," she hears Ryan say.

"Do you know what this means? What he might have done to him all this time?" She is paralyzed with fear, her eyes wide and her breathing labored.

"Come on, Beckett, don't make me regret calling you. A team is on its way to that farm. We should hear from them soon enough."

She sits back down but she can't seem to calm down. It's the call that will either make her or break her.

Half an hour later they get confirmation. The operation was a success. They surprised Tyson and captured him while killing his accomplice, Dr. Nieman, in the process. Another civilian was found pretty dehydrated and in a bad shape.

She can't talk, can't believe what she is listening but she manages to request they send them a picture of the civilian. Esposito's phone rings not long after and he shows them the pic he just received. Castle is in a pretty bad shape, dehydrated and thin; thinner than she's ever seen him. She clutches the phone to her chest and starts sobbing while both detectives panic since they haven't seen Beckett react like that before. And with her pregnancy, this can't be good.

"Beckett, hey come on. Relax please, you're stressing the baby," Ryan pleads but she doesn't seem to hear him.

One minute she is sobbing uncontrollably and the next she is asking for a doctor. "Ryan, I think I'm in labor. No, no, no this can't be happening. Not when we just found him. Please, I need him with me."

"Kate, calm down!" Lanie's voice is right next to her. She didn't even notice the ME entering the room. "Did your contractions start? What do you feel?"

"I don't know, I don't… please, Lanie, not now."

"Calm down, girl, and let me check on you. Come with me to the break room."

But they don't need to go far, because as soon as she gets up from the chair it's pretty obvious; she is in labor.

"Javi, call the ambulance now!"

"No, no, no. Castle! He should be here. I don't even have a name for the baby yet."

"Kate Beckett, shut up and calm down. There's no going back now"

* * *

Ryan and Esposito get Kate to the hospital where Alexis and Martha are waiting. She manages to tell them that Castle is alive and they are bringing him back. Alexis is left behind to find out all the details and in what condition her father is coming back, while Martha and Lanie escort Beckett to her room. The ride to the hospital has managed to calm her and she doesn't try to prevent the inevitable. The baby is coming and Castle won't be there to witness the birth of his second child.

With a lot of pushing from the boys, Gates and even the mayor, they manage to have Castle transferred to the same hospital as Beckett. After a three hour trip he is there and Alexis is waiting at the entrance.

"Daddy?"

His eyes flutter and he seems to come around.

"Hey, pumpkin. Missed me?" He tries to joke, but that sends Alexis right into his arms.

"Oh, Dad, I missed you so much. We were so worried."

"Sorry, Ma'am, we have to take him inside"

"Yeah, yes sorry" But she doesn't let go of his hand.

For the next hour doctors come and go, equipment wheeled in and out of the room. They don't have a chance to talk much. He briefly manages to ask for Beckett and his mother once or twice but a doctor or a nurse is always interrupting them. The guys are waiting to take his statement but they postpone it as much as they can, giving Alexis the time to spend with her father. Martha appears in the midst of another round of tests to deliver the good news to Alexis and the boys.

"Oh, Richard, I'm so glad you are back. You had us all worried"

He doesn't reply, he just smiles and he closes his eyes, all these rounds of tests have drained him.

They all head outside so that Martha can get into details.

"He is here. He gave his mother a hard time till he got here, but he wouldn't be a Castle if he didn't come out without a fuss." She laughs.

"He?" asks Alexis. They had all agreed they didn't want to know the gender before the baby was born.

"Yep, you've got a baby brother waiting to meet you," she replies happily.

"How is Kate?"

"Mother and son are resting for now. She delivered him naturally so she is exhausted but everyone is fine. How is Richard?"

"Didn't get the chance to tell him about the baby yet. He seems fine but who knows what Tyson did to him after all this time."

"That's Katherine's concern too. He was with that monster way too long. She wanted to come check on him but sleep won. Don't know if we'll be able to keep her away for much longer."

It's now Martha's turn to stay with Castle while Alexis and the boys head up to meet the new Castle. The nurse lets them into Beckett's room, and they whisper excitedly, gaping at his thick black hair; certainly something he got from his father. The baby is sleeping at the moment. - as is Beckett - but they all agree that he seems to have Beckett's nose and Castle's forehead.

As if sensing them, Beckett comes around.

"How is he?" is the first thing she asks.

"He is beautiful Beckett," Ryan answers.

She manages a smile, the first real smile they've seen from her in a while, but she sobers up quickly. "I actually meant Castle, did he say anything, how is he?"

"He seems fine, didn't get the chance to talk much with all the doctors coming and going but he seemed pretty good considering everything," his daughter informs her.

"Did you tell him?"

Alexis shakes her head.

"Might be better, we don't want to overwhelm him. If they let me I'll head down there myself.

"Beckett, you should rest too. You just had a baby." Ryan, the voice of reason interjects, and at that moment, the baby stirs. Beckett sits up, reaching into the crib next to her to pick him up.

Everyone is in awe as they witness Beckett holding the baby for the first time.

"Guys, meet baby Castle. He seems to take a lot after his father since he gave me quite a scare till he got here."

"Still no name for him?" asks the nurse, who has just come in.

"No, but now that his father is here we'll figure it out. Is it okay if we wait a day or two?"

"We need a name for his birth certificate, but it doesn't have to be now," the nurse informs her.

Everyone knows about his disappearance. The gossip mill had gone wild, especially the first few days, everyone speculating about the timing of his disappearance. That's when Kate had decided to give an end to all of this, by going on national television and clearing things up, offering a reward for any information that would come in handy and especially before she started showing.

"Thank you!" She hesitates to ask the next question; "When can I go see him?"

"Miss Beckett, you just had a baby, you need to rest and stay off your feet at least for today. Besides, it's time you try and feed the little guy."

She sighs, bites back the remark because it's not the poor woman's fault, she is just looking out for her, but she just wants to see him.

Ryan's voice cuts in, trying to use humor to make his point.

"You better find a way to get her downstairs after she feeds the baby or you'll find yourself searching for her."

"Let's acclimate the baby with his mother and after that we'll see what we can do."

Small victories, but she'll take it. She now focuses on the baby in her arms and addresses the next question.

"Want to hold your little brother before I feed him?" Kate senses Alexis' hesitation so she makes room on the bed and invites her to sit with her.

"Get over here and I'll pass him to you."

Alexis moves to sit, and when she finally has her brother in her arms, she is beaming.

"I'm so glad dad will get to meet him," is what comes out of her mouth without being able to sensor it; the two hold each other's gaze but they can't keep the tears away any longer.

"I wanted to name him Alexander, Alex for short, you know in case we didn't find your dad, but I don't think he'll approve now."

"Alex and Alexis? You trying to traumatize the kids for life?" the guys tease and they all burst out laughing, something that doesn't seem to agree with the boy.

"I think it's time we try and feed him." The nurse cuts in.

"And that's our cue to go. We should head down anyway see if your boy is up for an initial statement."

"No pressure. Go easy on him!" Kate tries to sound strict.

"Yes boss!" they mock.

* * *

The boys knock on Castle's door and Martha greets them with a huge smile. This should be a good sign right?

"Hey, bro! So nice of you to join us."

"You know me, always need to make an impression." He smiles.

They all sober up quickly.

"It's really good to have you back Castle."

"It's good to be back guys, but where is Kate? Mother was telling me she'd get here soon, but now it's only you?"

"Aw, we missed you too Castle!" Ryan says, trying to buy more time.

"You know what I mean," he tells them seriously, not in the mood for jokes. "Did something happen to her?" He tries to sit up and get out of bed but dizziness overtakes him.

"Whoa, Richard, you'll pull the IV, please lie back down."

"Where is Beckett?" he insists.

"We split up, she was following another lead further out with another team, so it'll be a while till she gets back, don't worry." It's Esposito who easily lies to him. "A couple of hours tops." And that's what seems to reassure him for now.

Castle is willing to talk to them about the time he was away and they manage to get his initial statement. Their fears come to life as they hear him tell them that everything that led to his kidnapping was staged by Tyson. Buying out Beckett's supposed ex to lie, altering her records. Everything that needed to be done that led Castle to drive alone to the Hamptons was a well-orchestrated plan by 3XK. What the maniac hadn't figured out, though, was what to do with him once he had him captured. So they sit there to hear him tell them that for months he was tied in a basement and Tyson came only to bring him food, water and pictures of Beckett to torment him. The worst part was when he showed him her TV interview… but it was what kept him going; knowing she hadn't given up hope, knowing she thought he was still alive. That led to a couple of failed attempts to escape. He had managed to open the basement door but there was no place to go. He also tells them that these last few weeks he could sense that whatever Tyson was planning was coming into place, so their timing was perfect.

Martha is sitting silently, part of her relieved that she had her son back, part of her horrified about the thousands of things that could have gone wrong these past eight months. She sees her son starting to lose his words, apparently tired, and she motions to the boys to call it quits for now.

They let him rest and meet outside his room.

"Hopefully he'll sleep for a couple of hours, but we need to find a way to bring him Katherine, or one of them will do something stupid to see the other."

* * *

When she is left alone with her sleeping son the worry settles. She can see right through her son's façade to make everyone settle down for now, but eight months is a long time and some kind of trauma is sure to come to surface. She just hopes his family being near, supporting him, will make his recovery better. The presence of the baby and the joy that'll bring him will surely help too.

She leaves her son to rest and heads up to arrange to bring the two back together.

* * *

"Not in the wheelchair," Kate objects. "He'll worry something happened."

"Something did happen darling; you had a baby barely three hours ago. You can't stand for long!"

"Fine!" she sighs, defeated.

Martha motions to Alexis to bring the chair. Kate has lost the hospital gown, and is now dressed in loose sweatpants and one of Castle's t-shirts that she usually "borrows" at home, too. The baby, for now, is in the nursery, under the nurses' watchful eyes.

They reach his room and she stops them; she wants to walk into his room. They let her, but she can see for herself that it wasn't the best idea when she starts feeling an unpleasant pressure.

Taking a deep breath she opens the door and there he is, still asleep, thin and pale. She walks on unsteady feet, eyes already watering. Martha and Alexis are not far behind bringing the wheelchair, but they leave her space.

When she is by his bedside, she is at a loss. She wants to wake him, see those gorgeous blue eyes, hear his voice, but at the same time she wants to let him rest. She settles in just holding and caressing his hand but there are tears streaming down her eyes.

"Katherine…" It's just her name, but Martha is rolling the wheelchair behind her, her intention clear, and Kate easily complies.

"We'll leave you two alone, but we'll be right outside if you need anything."

She doesn't know for how long she sits there, holding his hand, cataloguing the changes when he finally starts to stir. He seems disoriented, but his eyes settle on her.

"Hey…" she manages.

"Hi…" He smiles and tries to raise his arm to sooth her tears away.

They don't need more words, they just keep staring at each other smiling and crying at the same time.

"Missed you!"

"So much!" she replies.

He tries to move to make room for her on the bed, but she stops him. Her sitting places hides most of her belly and she doesn't want to come to conclusions on his own.

"Stay put," she tries to order. "Leave the cuddling for when you are better."

"Beckett!" he whines. "Come on! I feel fine!"

She can use an opening when she finds one, and this is her chance.

"How are you, really? What did the bastard do to you all this time?"

"Mind games mostly. No torture, besides being held in the basement with minimum food. But these last few weeks… he was planning something, Beckett. That's why he got out more and more, giving you the chance to spot him. He kept dropping hints… most of the time I thought he was referring to you, that you were his target, but then he'd confuse me by mentioning killing two birds with one stone… and I wouldn't know what he was talking about."

That bastard was targeting herself and the baby. The pregnancy gave him the perfect opportunity to hurt him with the worst possible way.

"So glad they found you, babe," she confesses.

"Yeah, I think I'm better off here," he jokes and that earns him a swat to the arm and one of the first real smiles he gets to see after so long.

"Hey! Injured man here, Beckett, with whom you won't even cuddle!"

"I need to tell you something." She sobers up.

"Uh, oh! Found another boyfriend already?"

Another smack, this time harder. "Don't even joke about that!"

"Sorry, sorry." He raises his arms in surrender. "I'm listening."

"There is no easy way to say this, and I know you'll feel ripped off, but please remember that everything is fine now."

"You're scaring me."

"Okay." She sighs. "Here goes. A couple of weeks after you disappeared I found out I was pregnant!" She finally gets up from the chair to occupy the space Castle was offering her on the bed. His eyes immediately land on her belly and the casual clothes she is wearing. He starts to say something but she stops him with a hand on his lips and a kiss on the cheek. As if by instinct, his hand is around her shoulder, cuddling her to him.

"Today…" she continues hesitantly, "when they told me they found you, my water broke. We now have a beautiful son, Castle!"

She takes her hand away from his lips but no sound comes. "I know it's too much, too soon, but I couldn't keep it from you. Plus, he needs a name and I almost named him Alexander." She chuckles. "Alexis and Alexander, can you imagine?" This time he is the one cutting off her ramblings with a kiss, too short after all this time.

"A baby? We have a baby?" Kate can only smile and nod. They try for another kiss while smiling, teeth clashing but they don't seem to care.

"So sorry you had to do it alone."

"I wasn't alone. Your mother, Alexis, Lanie, the boys, even Gates… everyone was there Castle, so don't beat yourself up for something that was out of your control."

"Still…"

"Hey, hey, none of that." She kisses his worries away.

"Where is he?" he asks after they part.

"Maternity ward, but Alexis has pics on her phone."

"Alexis!" she calls rather loudly.

That's the permission everyone needs and they come in flooding the small hospital room.

"Aw, aren't you two cute?" Alexis teases.

"Show your father the pictures."

"No!" he stops his daughter. "I want the baby here," he demands.

"I'll ask and see what we can manage." Martha exits but she doesn't get to go far, since Lanie is rolling the basinet towards the room.

Everyone is quiet waiting for the father-son meeting but one glare from Beckett, has them exiting the room, leaving the Castle family alone.

She leans over the basinet, already looking like a pro, although this is only her fourth time picking up the baby, and she turns back to the bed, giving their son to the waiting hands of his father.

"Rick, meet baby Castle…"

THE END


End file.
